Ten things maybe, only I hate!

BLOG 18

Ten things maybe, only I hate!

“Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.”
— Lily Tomlin

Since I am in this phase of making too many lists, I have made a list of ‘Things I Hate’. But the difference between this list and your list (if you’re as bored as me) is that maybe only I hate the enlisted things.
So here goes, another egotistic blog:

DOCTORS
Oh, I hate ‘em! I hate ‘em!! I hate ‘em!!!
You tell me, who needs an injection for a viral?? I’m not suffering from any disease, but they still ask me, whether I want an injection? [Read: Do I want to volunteer as a lab-rat to be poked with a needle, I repeat, ‘voluntarily?’] Of course NOT! What are tablets and syrups made for? I don’t understand what sadistic pleasure they get by giving injections. Okay, Mr. Doc, I realize that you’ve studied for so many years and invested so much money and time to cram all that tongue-twisting biological names and in turn have earned this license to inject/poke. Thank you for saving lives (really!); but don’t look disappointed when I say ‘no’ to an injection!

ANIMALS
To make it clear- I’m not scared of animals, I simply hate them; all of them- insects, birds, reptiles, fishes and domestic animals. See, I don’t wear fur, leather and I am an egg-etarian. If there’s a bug near me I will flick it. If a mosquito sucks my blood, I’ll smash it. I don’t intend to fight for animal rights ever. I will never come in the way of delusional people who force their love on the cuddly animals and humanize them with clothes or their habits! I prefer animals in the jungle- wild, blood-thirsty and animalistic; not tamed, artificial food-eaters and humanized! And if you come to think of it, the animals never asked you to fight for their rights so enthusiastically! Reminder- if you have a cheerful pet at home, don’t call me over!

CLOWNS
I maybe scared of clowns. I don’t find them funny at all. Tacky colorful clothes and bulging red nose is not funny; it is pitiful. Thanks to so many horror films and serials, Batman’s joker and bad clowns in parties I’ve acquired this fear. But I do not shriek or run away if I see one, I freeze!

PARTYING
Oh! This is something maybe only I hate. I don’t dance or sing so you will find me hogging on the snacks at parties. Parties are so boring for me. I enjoy watching good dancers or listen to some mind-blowing singers, but that is such a rarity. Also, nobody’s drunk in the kind of parties I go to, so there’s no drama at all. 😦

SHOPPING
This is such a chore for me. Gaawwd! I go for shopping when I really need something of my own taste. I hate looking out for the perfect dress, shortlist some, try all and buy none for one good reason or the other. I don’t go from shop to shop enthusiastically. Just barge in into one great looking shop, try something, like it, buy it and move out- that’s the mode of operation I choose to take. Shopping for clothes is a task, shopping for books is pleasure. Don’t frown on me! 

CLEANING
Simply explained- too much labor! I prefer cooking. If whenever in the future I am forced to clean my cupboard, desk or house I will buy for myself a perfect cleaning kit they advertise on TV. Cleaning with gadgets is so much cooler, labor-free and faster! 😉

LONG TRAVELS
I become home-sick; can’t tolerate any place in the world more than three days. I don’t mind permanent residence in an alien place but temporary travels bug me. I love to go ‘home’ at the end of the day.

LOAFING AROUND
I even don’t enjoy wasting time in the college campus doing nothing. I’d rather sleep or read. I don’t have a big gang and even with a big gang I would have made excuses to go home. I’m boring that way.

DRESSING UP FOR AN OCCASION
Aaaaaaaaaaaarrrgh! Totally frustrating!
Don’t tell me to dress appropriately for an occasion in ‘vague’ terms; I’ll never leave my bedroom. Don’t tell me to dress appropriately for an occasion in ‘distinct’ terms; I’ll not even bother to come.  

POSING FOR THE CAMERA
It is vain and pretentious! Can’t do it and will not do it! I’d rather be remembered through my writing than my awkward photographs.

I’d say even sending SMSes or forwards for no reason is irritating. Not that I am out of balance, I’m out of an ‘uncommon’ message most of the time. Every time I send a forward someone from the group already has it. It is irritating!!! But apparently that’s the way you keep in touch and if I don’t, I have many friend who get offended, so I have to. I’ve learnt to not hate it that much.
I’ll like to bring to your notice that my sister loves all of the above things (except clowns)! Humph!
Bordering abnormality,
Signing off,
Tame SheWolf

WORDLY WISE:

In order to learn the most important lessons of life, one must each day surmount a fear.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
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7 thoughts on “Ten things maybe, only I hate!

  1. I agree with the partying,loafing around,dressing up for an occasion,posing for the camera bit and also one thing that would be exclusive in my list would be my brother!

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  2. lol really funny n insightful…its jus so u…i knew quite sum things but some r new to me…gawd ur really one abnormal creature bt i guess thats part of y(pardon my use of shortform:P) v love u:D

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  3. I totally agree bout the clowns!!who the hell finds them funny??They are freakin scary man!!:/
    Ooh..Wanna know things I hate that most don’t?Bounty(I just don’t like chocolate and coconut together) and orange tictacs 😀

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  4. hahahaha awesome. This is one place where we differ 😛 crap. I love all of the above!!!!! partying shopping animals posing loafing (but with only selected people) dressing up and long travels. I dont like clowns and doctors. but i dont mind them either 😛 hahahaha! crazy dude one blog post where u r totally opposite me 😛

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